Why does this always happen? When things get insane at work, the last thing i want to do is something for me. I get home and have no motivation. I don't want to work on anything and want to sit on my lazy ass and fall asleep on the couch. It sucks me in. I sit down, watch a little television and the next thing you know your head is in the most uncomfortable awkward position and you are passed out. Now of course, when asked- where you asleep, my response will always be no. I think I say no cause i really don't want to be asleep and feel totally guilty. I should just go to bed. Then finally when i do go to bed, i am wide awake. What is up with that? like there is some magical drug that puts me under on the couch.
Work has been insane lately. My boss has been out of the office off and on, so i have to pick up his slack. We are doing some crazy events too. Tomorrow is the premiere of Wintuk, which is the Cirque du Soleil performance. We are having live ice carving happening at the event prior to the premiere. Then we are doing a crazy Russian event that is some awards show. That is a lot of ice as well. And then of course there is the entire month of December. December is crazy. We have to black out certain dates due to too many orders. It's a big ice month. I actually kind of thrive on that type of rush........ but at the same point i am ready for a vacation. Hence me passing out on the couch and being totally unmotivated. I go and excercise, or at least try to if i am not late for my Tae Kwon Do class. But I need a big kick in the ass to get to work.
The worst part of all of this is that I don't see myself being ready to do that upcoming show that my friend told me to do. That pisses me off and disappoints me as well. I feel like I failed myself, but at the same time, i just don't see how I could get it done. I did promise myself to do the project anyways. I need to still do it for my own sake. I need to try to do something larger than what i am comfortable doing and I need to do it cause i thought about it and know exactly what i want to do. So needless to say, i may not have a deadline to finish it, but i will finish it. I promise myself that will happen. I even got permission to use the welder downstairs from my work and need to take advantage of that. So, i may have failed myself and you all, but I do keep the promise of finishing it.
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